π•Ώπ–π–Š π•­π–‘π–”π–Œ 𝖔𝖋 𝕾𝖍𝖆𝕢𝖋𝖔𝖝

gay pride

My problem with pride is that it comes before the fall. Society got me hypnotized. Corporate America flew that flag everywhere so I figured it was time for everyone to come out of the closet.

"Finally, we can exorcize the demons and families can come together!"

Would you like to eat with me, together, as a family? We'll take care of each other's needs!

Yeah, that's not happening.

Well, I tried feeding him his own hands and feet and obviously, he wasn't having it, what with being a proud gun owner and living in Catholic daddy's house.

Ahhh, I wear this issues threadbare and with no one who wants to talk about it anymore. I fantasized an outcome where everyone was finally like "omg, Shakfox, you're so right! Let's have the Disney ending where there is a musical number where I apologize for being a dick and your family flies over and we laugh and libate at the Candle Inn!"

Yeah no. Moms would be down but dads would die of cringe. Sorry Shakfox. Your a gay Satan and your going to jail. Oops.

Well fuck leaning on my horticulture career. At this point, I let the rage carry over into my work and I cussed out an quit anyone who would have me.

It's just not fair! How come drag queens can groom at school but I can't let it go, let it go, like Elsa or whatever? Damn, I got jipped.

I just couldn't let go of how unfair all this fuckery has been. Now God won't let me nap in the park in peace. Constantly is that father figure voice telling me he told me so. And I'm just like "well damn Dad, it wouldn't be such a bother if you just shut the fuck up and enjoyed the fact that everyone is together and happy and sunshine and rainbows."

Nope. Had to keep your hand on that gun and never ask me to never tell. Now I'm constantly tormented by the pop songs playing at the gym. Now it all sounds like Devil music. Radio demon is haunting my workouts.

Just imagine how much better everything would be if we just did it my way! Moms would cry "how dare you shame my son" and then we could move in and split up all these othewise overwhelming bills.

Yeah, so, fuck gay pride. All you losers that are happy about being gay are going to Hell. I'll be there to whip you and cackle insesintly.